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i dont know whats emptier, my bank account or my love life
You ever have those moments where, just out of nowhere, you’re hit with a rock-hard Halloween boner? You are suddenly consumed with desire for pumpkin spice flavored everything, orange and black decorations everywhere you look, skulls, pumpkins, spiderwebs, spooky music, movies like Hocus Pocus and Trick R Treat, stripey stockings on the cheap, weak-ass little fog machines, ect. even though it’s the middle of goddamn June?
adulthood is just an endless stream of phone calls you don’t want to make but have to
dude god could come down from heaven with a million angels and tell me that gif is pronounced “jif” and i still wouldn’t fucking do it
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